A Pep Talk

To Whom It Concerns

"I Sold My Soul To The System" - is this the story of your life? In deciding if you can't beat them, join them, you become part of the system, and this only leads to cynicism. It is pointless criticising the system if you are part of it, that is suicidal. Resist, kick against the pricks, fight the system from the inside. Don't give up without a fight. Take no crap, give no crap, bring the crap detector you were born with into play.

Practice makes perfect, in this and all other respects. Tell it like it is, as I tell you. Stand up and be counted. I know you can do it. Change yourself and the sytem simultaneously. Do one and you do the other.

I hope this letter knocks the crap out of you. Now, knock the crap out of the system.

David **** (too old to care except for caring itself).

Prostitution

A prostitute is the only person who can't be sacked for lying down on the job. Ireland is full of prostitutes, politicians, civil servants, teachers and others, you know who you are, by no means all employed by the state. The take the money, but they're only interested in themselves, not the people they are supposed to serve. And why can't they be sacked? They made the rules, the prostitutes.

This is a country run by, with and for prostitutes, a high-class brothel. (That is not to say that some of the prostitutes don't have hearts of gold, but what can they do, they work in a brothel). Going through the motions is alright if you work in a sewer, but not elsewhere. To use a vulgarism, if you treat people like shit, you are shit. Or, to put it more politely, you are how you treat people.

Try putting others and the purpose of your job first, for a change. That would be a big change. Is that too much to ask? If it is, fuck off, you fucking piece of shit. Otherwise, welcome home.

****

When I showed the above piece to Conan the barman, he said it was bitter. "Not bitter", I said. "Angry", he said. "I am angry", I said. Later, I thought I could have asked him if he had a daughter this high, holding my hand somewhere above the ground, and she was raped. That's how I feel. Furious. Cold fury. "Everywhere, the ceremony of innocence is drowned" - W.B.Yeats. Children have to brought up in this corruption, where corruption is treated as normal. The powers that be are a corrupting influence, corrupting the young. Innocence is raped.

David (with stars in his eyes) ****

Cute Hoors

Inspired by an article in the Financial Times............

In Ireland, when people say "Cute Hoor", they mean someone who always puts himself first.

They say "You'd want to watch him, that fella, he's a cute hoor, he'll try to pull the wool over your eyes, that fella".

(Cute hoors learn the law to find a way to wriggle round it, they go by the letter not the spirit and love legal technicalities. Drug dealers and other merchants of death do the same).

Cute hoor politicians, cute hoor property developers and cute hoor bankers got us into the mess we are in, and they want us to pay for it.

At one time, Liam Carroll, property developer, was responsible for most of the building going on in Dublin. Frank McDonald, writing on the environment, said "They are our future slums". Tiny apartments, difficult to get into, and furniture won't fit up the stairs.

Cute hoor politicians give their friends million euro handshakes when they have been found out for fiddling, on the basis that this is the norm. They do this because they don't want them spilling the beans.

What about all the pensions they give themselves while they are still on the payroll?

George Orwell said the reason politicians speak the way they do is to conceal the fact that they are saying nothing.

We vote for them.

Who will protect us from ourselves?

Today in the Dail

by David ****

Political correspondent

Today in the Dail

================

The Taoiseach: FUCK it. We're up shit creek without a paddle.

Enda Kenny: I don't want to be mealy mouthed, but does the government know what its doing?

Eamon Gilmore: The trouble with this country is that it is run by bean counters. I want to be chief bean counter.

Caoimhean O'Caolain: I know what to do. Rob banks.

A Backbencher: The bankers have done that already.

The Taoiseach: We're all in the same boat, its called the Titanic. I got us get into this mess, but I haven't a FUCKING clue how to get out of it.

The head of the Green Party: We can all go and live in the woods.

The Minister for Finance: In my budget, I have managed to protect the property developers and the bankers.

The Minister for Blather: The Equality Authority is introducing measures to go some way towards bringing the Civil Servants into equality with the rest of us, and they FUCKING hate it.

Eamon O'Cuiv: Liathroidi, Liathroidi, Liathroidi.

.

Explanation

For the “New Irish”. (Make yourselves at home)

Dail (dawl) means parliament. An Taoiseach (on teashock) is Irish for "the prime minister".

History: An Taoiseach used the "F" word in the Dail.

Enda Kenny leads the main opposition party, which gets elected only by default.

Eamon Gilmore heads the Labour party, which "always wrestles with its conscience, and always wins".

Caoimhin O'Caoilain represents Sinn Fein, also called Sinn Fein/I.R.A.

A banker fiddled one hundred and eighty million euros.

The Green party may be "as green as they're cabbage looking".

The Equality Authority placed an advertisement headed "Man Wanted".

Eamon O'Cuiv force feeds the people with the Irish language.

"Liathroidi" (leahroedee) is plural of the English word, "ball".

"Who's Minding the Store?" - the Marx Brothers.

About our Correspondent

(by his brother)

He picks his nose, uses the "F" word and scratches his liathroidi.